We are gathered here today to pour scorn on inhumanity's weaknesses and foibles 
A fear of cellars, crypts, and caves 
Underground hollow evacuated lecture theatre 
Shadow strewn interior 
Abandoned gas house 
Topomaniac genophobia dispophobia gymophobia philophobia 
Scholophobia phenophobia panophobia 
Our leader fears the dark - have a nasty night! Hirsute! 
Lazy long nosed decadent pink skinned gigantic Englishmen Jay ay pee know nose job